Margaret Minnicks has been an online writer for many years. She writes articles that are interesting to her readers.
Everybody does not have the same interests, likes, and dislikes. Therefore, what makes one person happy is unlikely to make everyone else happy. Even identical twins have different things that make them happy.
There are at least ten common things that are keeping most people from being happy.
- Putting Yourself Down
- Thinking Negative Thoughts
- Using Negative Speech
- Doubting Yourself
- Not Trusting God
- Harboring Unforgiveness
- Not Living in the Present
- Thinking the Worst Will Happen
- Being Ungrateful
- Believing You Don't Deserve to Be Happy
1. Putting Yourself Down
The first thing you can do to enjoy happiness is to stop putting yourself down. Stop being so hard on yourself. Stop being negative about who you are. If the truth is told, a lot of unhappy people are partially to blame for their own unhappiness. They don't have to wait for others to put them down because they are doing a good job of doing so themselves.
You put yourself down and destroy all chances of being happy when you judge yourself negatively. You must stop telling yourself things similar to the following:
- "I am too old."
- "I am too young."
- "I am too stupid."
- "I am too ugly."
- " I am too afraid."
Isaiah 54:17 says, "No weapon that is formed against you will succeed, and every tongue that rises against you in judgment you will condemn." The relevant question is: "What if you are the weapon against yourself?"
Get out of the habit of negative self-talk. Change the way you talk about yourself. God made you in His own image, and that image is not negative. If you must talk about yourself, say what David said, "I will praise You because I have been fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14).
2. Thinking Negative Thoughts
In order to speak positive words, you must change your thoughts because you will usually speak what you think. The Bible says, "Be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind" (Romans 12:2).
If you are in the habit of thinking and speaking negatively, it will take some time to rid yourself of the habit, but it can be done. Pay close attention to what you think about. If you think about something negative, change it before the words come out of your mouth because once they are out, you cannot put them back in.
Barbara Fredrickson, a psychologist at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, revealed that if you pay more attention to positive things, they will outweigh negative thoughts, feelings, and words and the negativity will shrink.
3. Using Negative Words
Another piece of advice is similar to the first two pieces. Not only should you stop using negative words about yourself, but you should also stop using negative words to describe anything. When you use negative words, you are calling negative things into your life. The solution to that is to be as positive as you can be about yourself and everything else.
4. Doubting Yourself
If you really want to be happy, you must do the following things:
- You must believe in yourself.
- You must believe that you deserve to be happy.
- You must believe that you can be happy.
5. Not Trusting God
The Bible tells us over and over to be bold, to be courageous, and not to be afraid. Joshua was faced with a huge assignment of leading the Israelites into the promised land after the death of Moses. He did not think he was able to complete the assignment successfully. God told him the following words:
“Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go." (Joshua 1:7)
6. Harboring Unforgiveness
You keep yourself from being happy when you harbor unforgiveness in your heart. You carry extra baggage on yourself when you do not forgive others even when they have done you wrong. Forgiving others will help you unload the emotional baggage that is stealing your happiness. That does not mean forgetting what they have done to you. It does mean to stop holding the person hostage. Therefore, you should release the person so both of you can be free.
Unforgiveness keeps you from being happy.
7. Not Living in the Present
People who always live in the past can never be completely happy because they wish they had done some things better even when they had no control over what happened. Besides, they cannot go back and undo the past.
People who always live in the future can never be completely happy because they are waiting for their happiness to come at a later date instead of at the present time. Some people say, "I'm waiting for my ship to come in."
People who live in the present are the happiest. They are at peace without the baggage of past events and without the "what ifs" for the future.
Be happy by living neither in the past nor in the future. Be happy by living in the present.
8. Thinking the Worst Will Happen
If you keep thinking the worst and speaking the worst will happen, guess what? You will not be disappointed. The worst will happen when you think it will. The worst will happen when you call it forth.
Think positive thoughts. Speak positive words. Envision all that is positive, and positive things will fill your life, and you will be happy.
9. Being Ungrateful
If you want to be happy, always thank God for your blessings. Count your many blessings, name them one by one should not just be lyrics in a song to be sung. The instruction is valuable and is something you should do on a regular basis.
Learn to be grateful and give thanks for everything. We are told throughout the Bible to give thanks because the Lord is good (Psalm 107:1).
10. Believing You Don't Deserve to Be Happy
It is unfortunate that some people actually believe they cannot be happy. They believe they do not deserve happiness. They don't think they are worthy enough to be happy.
Know that God made you in His own image, and the Bible tells us many times how much God loves us. Therefore, He wants the best for us. That includes for us to be happy.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.