Chronically Ill and Waiting for Eternity

Updated on August 21, 2017
Diana Majors profile image

I'm Diana, happily married, and blessed by God on a daily basis. I live with chronic illnesses, but I don't let that get me down!

Chronically Ill and Waiting

Those who are chronically ill get used to waiting. I'd like to be able to say we get good at it, but I find myself getting a little impatient sometimes. It seems we are always waiting on something. Maybe it's our next doctor's appointment, test results, or waiting at the pharmacy to pick up this month's prescriptions, but we're waiting.

Waiting can be overwhelming. Before my health problems, when I was "well", I believed that people who whined about waiting just needed to get a grip. Now that I'm a little older and I need a refund for my defective body, I feel a little differently about it! I try not to whine because my mama taught me to wait like a lady, which is to say to keep my trap shut and keep smiling. That was a lesson I've employed more than once. Thanks, Mom!

I've tried to narrow it down to just three main things I'm waiting for. I'm waiting on wellness for my body, for Social Security Disability to make their decision about my application, and I'm waiting on the Lord. Are you waiting, too? Keep reading, and we can wait together, doing something constructive. My parents taught me that, too.

Waiting for Wellness

Do you wait for wellness? I still do. It isn't that I haven't accepted the idea that this is chronic, which, by definition, means it isn't going to get better. I won't be well again, but I'd like to be well-er. I know that isn't a word, but I'd like to be healthier than I am now. I'd love to be properly diagnosed, so I can get on the road to recovery. At this point, just stabilizing my condition so it doesn't continue to worsen would seem like a gift!

You may think I'm asking a little much of our healthcare system, of the doctors, or of fate. You may be right in thinking that, but I choose to remain optimistic and keep a good attitude about this. If I'm going to have these health problems, I'm not going down without a fight!

In the past, I joked around with coworkers about my mad ninja skills (of which I know nothing), and was met with good-natured laughter. My boss even told me once that I was about as scary as butterflies and rainbows! If you know me, you'd laugh too. Admittedly, he hit the nail on the head!

Just because I'm one of the clumsiest people I know, and I giggle more than a little girl, I'm still a chronic illness warrior! I will fight against this illness, thanks to be encouragement of my family and friends.

If you've been sick for a while, you may have stopped waiting to be well again. That's alright; you can do everything that you can to maintain your current wellness. That's something worth trying for!

Waiting for a Disability Application Decision

Sometimes people who have been diagnosed with a chronic ailment can continue to work for years and maintain a fairly regular lifestyle, and I congratulate them! Their walk may be difficult, but they have learned what works in their lives. I'm genuinely glad for them!

I have an acquaintance who was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis years ago. I think she's a strong woman who continues to move forward with her life. She has learned how to manage her routine in order to work two jobs and still have the energy to watch her grandkids play baseball on Saturdays! I'm thankful for her courage and her example!

I, on the other hand, haven't been able to work due to my health for nearly nine months now. If you've been ill for many years, that may not seem like very much time to you, but to me it feels like a really long time to be without a job!

I waited on my wellness, but have filed for Social Security Disability. I won't even get into the denial I was in that prevented my filing for so long even when the doctor and my family were telling me I should. That's a story for another time.

So now I'm waiting on their decision regarding my application, whoever "they" may be. I fully expect to be denied this, the first, time, and so I am continually saving documents from healthcare providers and maintaining a health journal for when I have to reapply for disability benefits.

Have you been on this road of waiting for your disability application decision? Then you understand that although it isn't something that may keep you awake at night, it can start to become an ever-present presence in your life. You know it won't be the same amount of income as your working a full-time career, but every little bit helps to continue to keep the lights on. So here I sit, waiting.

Waiting on the Lord

This is by far my favorite point! I went to bed early tonight because my body and mind were so tired, but I couldn't sleep thanks to some autonomic dysfunction symptoms. As I continued to lay in the bed and wish myself to sleep, my mind began singing an old hymn that I love, "Teach Me Lord". I haven't thought of that song in a really long time, so I know the Spirit must have brought it to mind. I'm so glad He did! That song has always been enjoyable to sing, but as I get older (and more mature, I hope) I am able to sing it in spirit and truth. It's a beautiful prayer hymn.

To wait on the Lord is completely different than my other waiting. For the majority of us, waiting is a completely physical act, but waiting on the Lord is hoping in Him. To trust that He will do exactly as He has promised is so reassuring when everything around us that we put our physical trust in seems to be failing us. People and things aren't a perfect mainstay, but the Lord is always there with us.

In Isaiah 40:28-31, God's prophet Isaiah wrote,

"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

Wow!! Did you read all of that? In studying this tonight, I found Luke 18:1 where Jesus tells a story to teach them that "they should always pray and not give up." Likewise, in 2 Corinthians 4:16-18, the apostle Paul writes about "wasting away" outwardly, but "inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all." Oh my! That makes me excited for that time! So excited, in fact, that I wanted to share my hope with you, so that you, too, may be encouraged.

"Teach Me Lord" hymn

What Are You Waiting For?

As someone who struggles with my health and all the effects it has on my life, I find that I often need encouragement. I find it by studying the Bible, praying, and in singing hymns. Other things can distract me from my troubles, but comfort and hope of eternity in Heaven fills my soul and feeds my spirit like nothing else can.

So yes, I'm still waiting. I will continue to wait for wellness. I will wait for a while longer to learn whether my disability application has been approved or denied. And I will wait on the Lord for the rest of my life, joyfully!

Thank you for taking the time to read this article. If you have found it helpful, please share it with others. We never know who may need some encouragement!

Please share with me what it is you are waiting for by writing them in the comments! I'd love to hear from you!

What do you wait for?

See results

© 2017 Diana Majors


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • Diana Majors profile imageAUTHOR

      Diana Majors 

      2 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      @Georgia- I wear many hats! Ha ha! I'm glad you found it helpful!

    • Diana Majors profile imageAUTHOR

      Diana Majors 

      2 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      @Rita- Sometimes we all lose sight of our priorities. It usually takes something major in our lives to wake us up. It's always a pleasure to be able to attend worship with our family. I'm sure your daughter loved every second of hearing your voice during the song service!

    • Georgia Estes profile image

      Georgia Estes 

      2 years ago from Arkansas

      So, not only are you a daughter of the King...but you are a waitress.

      Very good article! Meaningful even to those who do not have chronic illness.

    • profile image

      Rita Lamb 

      2 years ago

      I loved LOVED this article!!!!

      Be disabled myself I still wait for wellness and Heaven. Unfortunately and I must sadly admit that I was living like there was no tomorrow UNTIL my back shut me down. I definitely had a come to Jesus meeting . I would go to church with my daughter when it came time to sing the hymns I would just tear up and cry during the songs.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)