What Is an Attitude of Gratitude and How Can It Help You Lead a Happier Life?

Updated on March 5, 2018
letstalkabouteduc profile image

After struggling with depression and anxiety most of my life, I'm now dedicated to becoming a stronger person who lives life to the fullest.

A Life of Gratitude Will Make You Happier and Healthier

More and more research shows the infinite power of gratitude to improve our lives.
More and more research shows the infinite power of gratitude to improve our lives. | Source

An Attitude of Gratitude Makes for a Happier Life

Four years ago, I weighed 40 pounds more than I do now. All my activities as a teacher, wife, and mother were severely restricted by my excess baggage, making me tired and apathetic. Because I lost confidence in myself, a perceptive but merciless supervisor took advantage of my vulnerability, treating me rudely and greatly increasing my workload. I was struggling to parent my two sons (one with autism) and taking Zoloft to deal with anxiety and depression. I was in a zombie-like state, going through the motions of life but not feeling much of anything—no sadness, yes, but also no joy and excitement.

It's said alcoholics must hit rock bottom before they're ready to surrender to their disease and start the road to recovery. Although not a drinker, I was certainly at that lowest of low points, realizing I had to find a deeper purpose and make huge changes in my life. That's when I turned to gratitude and placed it at the center of my existence. According to the latest scientific research, living a life full of gratitude has the following benefits:

  • It improves physical health. Grateful people are more pro-active about taking care of themselves—going to the doctor, exercising, and eating nutritious foods.They experience fewer aches and pains.
  • It enhances psychological well-being. Grateful people are happier and less stressed out. They're less likely to experience negative emotions such as jealousy, anger, and regret.
  • It promotes better sleep.
  • It promotes self-esteem.
  • It makes us more empathetic and sensitive.
  • It makes us more friendly and appealing. People respond favorably to those who show appreciation. A warm smile, a friendly "thank you," and basic good manners help us build new connections—both personal and professional.

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

— Robert Brault

Gratitude Turns a Pessimist Into an Optimist

In addition to overhauling my life—quitting my job, weaning myself off anti-depressants, and addressing my crappy childhood—I started reading about ways to find peace and joy. What kept coming up again and again is that contentment comes from within and involves a deep appreciation for everything in our lives: our health, our family and friends, our careers, our pets, nature, books, movies, travel, love, and adventures. Instead of numbing myself with prescription drugs, I started doing the opposite—opening up myself to experience life more fully. I began living in the moment—slowing down to notice the wonders around me and not taking anything for granted. I tuned out the negativity that had once engulfed me, especially those critical messages that came from within my very own head. This is what wise teachers told me about living a life grounded in gratitude:

Oprah Winfrey: Jot Down 5 Things You're Grateful for Every Day

Keeping a gratitude journal is a fantastic way to develop a deep appreciation for everything in life—both big and small.
Keeping a gratitude journal is a fantastic way to develop a deep appreciation for everything in life—both big and small. | Source

Oprah Winfrey—Make Gratitude a Part of Your Daily Routine

As a talk show host, actress, producer, and philanthropist, Oprah Winfrey (media mogul) is one of the most influential people in the world. From humble beginnings, she found enormous success in life and credits gratitude for helping her along the way. As fans of hers know, she has a long-standing daily habit of writing down five things she's grateful for in her gratitude journal.

If it works for Oprah, I decided to try it for myself with amazing results. It made me pay attention to all the simple things that bring me joy: eating a slice of watermelon on a hot summer day, playing Scrabble with my husband, sitting by the fire and reading the newspaper, listening to my boys talk in their bedroom before falling asleep, sipping green tea while folding the laundry. Little things brought me so much delight and writing them down made me aware of that. It only took minutes out of my day but became an invaluable part of my routine, making me appreciate so much and keeping me focused on the positive.

Gratitude turns what we have into enough, and more, it turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity...it makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.

— Melody Beattie

Dr. Robert Emmons—Go Through the Motions and the Feelings Will Follow

If you're in a place like I was— a dingy cellar of despair and negativity—it seems unlikely (and even impossible) that you could simply flip a switch and go from gloom to gratitude. Fortunately, Dr. Robert Emmons (psychologist and gratitude scholar) says we don't need to make such a miraculous transformation. He recommends that we simply take concrete actions to express gratitude on a daily basis: smile at those around us, say “thank you” to those who help us, and write little notes to those who touch our lives. When we practice gratitude in our daily lives, the feelings of gratitude will then awaken within us.

His advice made me think of the saying, "fake it 'til you make it," and that became my mantra when I began practicing gratitude. I had become so cynical about the friends and family members who had abandoned me when my son got diagnosed with autism. Now, I had to put those hard feelings aside and consciously look for nice things people were saying and doing. I began to notice and acknowledge any little act of kindness and, as I did so, my heart began to gradually open once again to the goodness of people.

Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance.

— Eckhart Tolle

Eckhart Tolle—Embrace Your Challenges With Gratitude

When my son was diagnosed with autism, my world turned so bleak and I only saw a future full of struggles for both him and me. When I looked around and saw my friends with healthy, happy kids, I became angry and bitter thinking God was punishing me. It felt like I had no control of my situation and that left me hopeless.

Eckhart Tolle (spiritual teacher and author) convinced me otherwise, making me understand the power of my own thoughts to change my life. By embracing the challenge of having a son with special needs instead of resisting it, I opened up myself to a new and exciting world. I read about treatments to help my child. I met other parents with autistic youngsters, who shared their wisdom and compassion. I marveled at the kindness shown to us by my son's occupational therapist, speech therapist, and doctors. As I accepted the reality of my life, the constant stress I had been feeling started to fade away and I finally experienced some relief. Now, many years later, I feel immense gratitude for the son I have and for all the lessons he taught me about love, patience, and acceptance.

Eckhart Tolle and Oprah Winfrey Discuss How Abundance and Gratitude Come From Within

Book Recommendation

A New Earth (Oprah #61): Awakening to Your Life's Purpose
A New Earth (Oprah #61): Awakening to Your Life's Purpose

Like so many of us, I've lived in the past, holding on to hurt and resentment, or the future—worrying about bad fortune that may or may not come my way. By reading this book, I learned the huge value of living in the present and creating a life based on gratitude. Eckhart Tolle makes a convincing argument that enjoying a full life means appreciating the here and now and taking in all the wonders around us. Now, whether I'm stuck in traffic or stuck in the laundry room folding clothes, I don't resist my reality. I embrace the situation at hand and make the most of it.

 

Questions & Answers

    © 2017 McKenna Meyers

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      • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

        McKenna Meyers 

        8 months ago from Bend, OR

        I'm glad, Catherine. I feel better about life when I write in my gratitude journal. Sometimes I just list 5 things for which I'm grateful but other times I write paragraphs about them. It helps me get in touch with myself and bring balance and purpose to my life. I'm a person who can easily fall into the dumps so I'm always battling to stay positive.

      • CatherineGiordano profile image

        Catherine Giordano 

        8 months ago from Orlando Florida

        I too have been influenced by Oprah's "attitude of gratitude." Everything you say in this article rings a bell with me. I'm inspired to work on my gratitude journal.

      • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

        McKenna Meyers 

        9 months ago from Bend, OR

        Thanks, Patricia. Your family has learned the secret to true happiness. Living in the now and appreciating each moment is one of the hardest things for me to do but also the best feeling in the world. I don't want to waste time rehashing the past or worrying about the future. It has no purpose.

      • pstraubie48 profile image

        Patricia Scott 

        9 months ago from sunny Florida

        Cannot agree more...life is about appreciating the little things as they truly do become the BIG things as the quote above suggests. We have learned in my family to grasp the wonders in each day and treasure them. Hoping many read and are filled with inspiration from this article. Angels headed your way ps

      • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

        McKenna Meyers 

        9 months ago from Bend, OR

        Thanks for the kind words. I grew up in a household with a negative father. His favorite saying was: "Life is hard and then you die." Well, that turned out to be a self-fulfilling prophecy. He was a joyless guy—always stressed— and died at 62. He was waiting for retirement and then he'd be happy. He didn't understand that contentment comes from within and begins with gratitude.

      • Venkatachari M profile image

        Venkatachari M 

        9 months ago from Hyderabad, India

        True, feeling and expressing "Gratitude" is a wonderful tool that makes you very happy and the most satisfied person in this world. You will be counting the plus points of your life and always feel happy.

        Thanks for posting this wonderful article to make the people realize this fact and practice it.

      • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

        McKenna Meyers 

        9 months ago from Bend, OR

        Yes, Peg, now I always look for the rainbow among the dark clouds. Since adopting a life of gratitude, I've discovered so many fabulous benefits. One of them is the upbeat people I now attract to my sphere. I once had so many gloomy people in my life and now I have none. It seems they get repulsed by those who are positive!

      • PegCole17 profile image

        Peg Cole 

        9 months ago from Dallas, Texas

        This is one of the most profound truisms that helped me through some of my most difficult times - An Attitude of Gratitude. I believe now that if we look for the good we can always find it. Thanks for sharing such an important message.

      • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

        McKenna Meyers 

        9 months ago from Bend, OR

        Thanks, Bill. There's so much going on in our country and world that made me feel helpless. While I still want to stay informed and involved, I also needed to take a step and get some perspective. Living a life full of gratitude helped me do just that. Your articles are filled with a positive spirit—an appreciation for writing, family, farming, home—and that's one reason we enjoy them so much. We all need hope to keep us going.

      • billybuc profile image

        Bill Holland 

        9 months ago from Olympia, WA

        An attitude of gratitude saved my life. There is no hyperbole in that statement, no attempt at shock value, nothing but the truth. Love this article!

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