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Do You Have an Anchor in Life With a Support Group or Friend?

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Glenn Stok studies self-awareness and emotional well-being. He writes about it to help his readers with mindfulness and self-doubt.

Do You Have an Anchor in Life?

Do You Have an Anchor in Life?

Anchors are best known as nautical instruments to stabilize vessels. The term also represents the stability and support we get from friends and family members who help keep us grounded when things aren’t going well.

I will discuss the significance of having an anchor to maintain your stability and help you in your time of need.

A Support Group Keeps Us Stable and Anchored

Stability in one’s life is vital for being mentally healthy and productive. It’s crucial to have a support group to provide stability. That’s your anchor in life and can be family, friends, or mentors.

When we run into challenging situations that need a secure approach to solve problems, it helps when we’re not alone and have someone to turn to for guidance. Merely sharing thoughts can provide meaningful direction.

We sometimes can’t think things through by ourselves because we have too many issues that keep us from recognizing what we need to do., such as denial and fear. That could make us choose the wrong path and waste time rather than focusing on the best option.

Sometimes we tend to run in all directions trying to find a foothold or figure out what we need to do. We lose the ability to grip onto our planned goals and stay focused. Have you ever noticed yourself in that condition?

Success is more achievable when we can collaborate with others. We need someone to talk to when we need to make decisions or just when we are feeling down. That’s so important for emotional health and well-being.

What Does an Anchor Mean Spiritually?

In a spiritual sense, an anchor represents hope and faith. It’s a symbol of safety and security. That feeling gives us hope and confidence that things will turn out alright.

That’s why it’s so important to make sure we have a support group of people we trust and can turn to when we need to hear someone else’s opinion.

Sometimes Family Members Can Be Your Anchor

Some people say they turn to family for support, usually when they have nowhere else to turn. Family is what guides most of us because they have always been there, although that’s not true for everyone.

However, when one has close family members, they can receive love and understanding from those who know you best. These two things help create the power to move forward with important decisions in life.

What if you don’t have a close family? What if you have a dysfunctional family? If that’s the case, where are you getting your energy to survive, guide you, help make decisions, and learn? That’s where a support group can be your anchor.

Friends Can Be Your Anchor as a Support Group

Friends Can Be Your Anchor as a Support Group

A Support Group Can Be Your Anchor

Not everyone has the advantage of love and understanding from family. Without that, they are on their own to deal with life’s issues and decision-making. That is when having a support group is critical.

Close friends who care about each other can provide support and advice. However, it’s essential to know when a friend needs advice or when they want support for a decision they already had made.

I have frequently noticed that when a friend asks for help, they don’t listen to the advice. I concluded that we need to determine what a friend wants when they come to us for advice. It may be taken as a judgmental criticism if they are not in the frame of mind to desire honest guidance.

Where do you stand with that? When you reach out for help from a support group, a family member, or a friend, are you really looking for solutions? No support group will be helpful with the wrong match to one’s needs.

What Does an Anchor Mean in a Relationship?

One of the best anchors we can have in life, in my opinion, is that of a partner or spouse. Nothing can come any closer to the contentment we have in our lives when we are with someone we feel comfortable with, someone we know we can share our innermost feelings with and can confide in with our private thoughts.

Being close is what characterizes an anchor relationship. Because most assets are also anchors, this category probably represents more than

Most relationships that endure are those with partners that provide an anchor for one another. That represents more than 90% of long-term relationships.1

Create Your Own Tribe

You’ll find it a powerful force to have a connection with like-minded people who share your values and views. Consider this your tribe, and nurture them once you have organized such a group.

When looking for people to be part of your tribe, consider integrity, accountability, and loyalty as their most important attributes. These people serve as an anchor. They can offer advice or give their opinion when needed most.

I have friends who don’t fit this picture. I don’t envision them to have any integrity, and I can’t count on them. They are good people, but they are broken in some way. I respect them for what they are, but I know I cannot consider them to be part of my tribe as I describe here.

You probably have friends like that too, and that’s okay. But be careful about considering them as an anchor in your life. Their lack of stability will crush you.2

Keep a Close Circle of Friends

When you have close friends who you know are kind and respectful, it’s nice to enjoy their company and share activities. They may not be the best resource for anchors, but they provide something of value that you would not want to dismiss.

Engage with them on a one-on-one basis. Stay in contact with phone calls and email, and share words of appreciation when you exchange ideas.

Everyone seeks happiness, and it helps to be part of a group.

Unfortunately, some people tend to shy away from large groups. I had a friend who had avoided being part of our circle of friends. Inviting her to attend get-togethers was like pulling teeth.

She seemed to have no interest in getting together with the rest of us. She missed out on having contact with people who knew about her ex-husband’s shenanigans. She would have had more information about his avoiding child support by lying to her about his income. He caused her a lot of grief and stress, and she had no one with whom to share that.

I tried to get her to join us so she could compare notes with those who knew what he was doing, but she instead decided to remain isolated. She eventually died, and she was only in her early 60s. People die from stress and loneliness. It happens.

What About You?

Is there anything that can derail you, emotionally or professionally? Do you have an active support group you can turn to when you feel the need? As I said, this can be anything from family to friends. It can even be a counselor or mentor.

Life is too precious to have to struggle with it alone.

References

  1. Elias Aractingi. (August 19, 2015). “There Are 6 Types of Relationships: Which One Is Yours?” Thought Catalog
  2. Natha Jay. “Loyalty & Accountability” ~ Walking in Both Worlds (Retrieved May 23, 2021)

Comments

Glenn Stok (author) from Long Island, NY on May 26, 2021:

You really got the point of having a tribe, Audrey. Thanks for your comment. When I first discovered the concept, I studied it in detail and found it to be a great way to consider true friends who share common values.

Audrey Hunt from Idyllwild Ca. on May 25, 2021:

I really like the idea of having a "tribe." There are times when I feel the need for a supportive shoulder. This article is absolutely full of support and understanding. Wonderful!

Thank you so much, Glenn.

Audrey

Glenn Stok (author) from Long Island, NY on May 24, 2021:

McKenna, your experience shows that we learn who our true friends are in times of need. I’m glad you found a spiritual path to compensate for the difficult time.

McKenna Meyers on May 24, 2021:

Glenn, this is an especially valuable article during May, mental health month. While people count their Facebook "friends" in the hundreds, we need just 1 or 2 folks who are really there for us: showing up in-person, being there during challenging times, and offering compassionate listening. When I was younger, I thought that I had my tribe. It was only when my son got diagnosed with autism that I realized they were friends of little consequence. It was painful, but I had to rebuild and focus of those who were positive, urged me to take care of myself, and encouraged my spiritual journey.

Pamela Oglesby from Sunny Florida on May 24, 2021:

This is an interesting article, Glen. I am blessed to have a very supportive family, and I have a church group. I have another girlfriend also and we go to DAR meetings together. You are certainly right about the benefits of an anchor.

Glenn Stok (author) from Long Island, NY on May 23, 2021:

I understand your viewpoint Brenda. A lot of people feel the way you do. I wrote an entire article a few years ago on the issue you mentioned. Whatever method that works for you is best as long as it leads to success. Thanks for your input

Glenn Stok (author) from Long Island, NY on May 23, 2021:

John, thanks for checking out this article and confirming the need for a tribe support group as an anchor in life.

BRENDA ARLEDGE from Washington Court House on May 23, 2021:

Glenn

I often don't turn to others for support.

I do sometimes check out support groups online, but I know the ultimate choice is mine.

I don't like including people close to me because I may not take their advice & each of us is different.

There are those I mention things to about my health, etc...but I usually don't want to know their advice.

This is a good article though and I can see how it can benefit alot of people.

John Hansen from Queensland Australia on May 23, 2021:

A very useful article Glenn. We all need an anchor or tribe/support group to help us get through the difficult things in life. Thanks for sharing.

Glenn Stok (author) from Long Island, NY on May 23, 2021:

Kathleen, Thanks for your kind words. Your comment helps me know I'm doing the right thing.

Glenn Stok (author) from Long Island, NY on May 23, 2021:

Umesh Chandra Bhatt - What you describe could often be a struggle that one needs to deal with, and you are right that one's family can help them follow the right path.

Kathleen Cochran from Atlanta, Georgia on May 23, 2021:

Glenn, glad to see a familiar face and an example of productive writing. I'm not on HP often any more, but it's great to see you are still turning out thoughtful articles.

Umesh Chandra Bhatt from Kharghar, Navi Mumbai, India on May 23, 2021:

Most of the people have it as one has a big psychological feeling that in time of adversary or problem some of them will advise and help. I think that itself is a big support. Living in isolation required much courage and self confidence. That is why people living in joint families are so happy, cheerful, and of course at the same time careless also!

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