Learn How to Feel Your True Feelings
It's utterly essential to learn how to deal with feelings and emotions that are the core of human existence.
We live in a world where hustling and being efficient and productive matter the most. Nowadays, everything is about proving you're worthy, that you have what it takes and can perform.
Because of this hustle culture, people are slowly but remarkably noticeably stopping to acknowledge and non-judgementally reflect on their inner feelings. They put their feelings and emotions aside and walk on and on without appropriately reflecting on why they feel what they feel.
The main issue is that emotions and feelings are crucial components of our species. We have them for a reason. They fill the function of signal flares in our lives and indicate what we must direct our awareness to.
Hustle Culture Encourages Us to Feel Less and Do More
Hustle culture has been on the rise for the last 10,15 years. The idea of working endlessly to achieve your dreams, working when others sleep to get an edge, is a destructive motivation machine that has led to many burnouts – burnouts that continue to rise in our society.
We're Slaves of a System That We Constantly Try to Win
The current social systems value hustling. They cherish those who goes all the way trying to win the system by owning more, earning more, doing more, and so on. The taxes you pay for such a lifestyle is your health and well-being.
“It's okay to admit that something can be "best" just because it makes you happy, and not because you had to tear yourself apart to get there.”
— Morgan Rogers
Slow Down and Reflect Over Your Emotions and Feelings
Now you maybe think. Okay, I understand that not taking care of myself and my feelings and emotions will have negative consequences. But how do I find time to do all this? Do I need to meditate, do journaling, or practice yoga?
No, no, and yet again, no. In all honesty, you don't need to do any particular exercise, and during days when you're already overstressed, it's not a good idea to do any additional planning whatsoever.
It's All About Decelerating
Nobody is saying that you should quit the things you do. Most of us need to work or study to make a living, so simply giving your employer or school principal a mid-finger is not a solution for the vast majority of us.
However, you have all the right to do your tasks at your own pace, not anyone else's. We are all different, and some of us need more time to accomplish our tasks. You may be overwhelmed if forced to work fast, and we all know the feeling, right?
It can be that sick feeling in the stomach or the headache that gives you the signal that you need to slow down to be able to take everything in. You can also experience brain fog, something I struggle with as well.
Do Not Ignore the Symptoms
Do not ignore these symptoms. The saying "it will go over itself" is a false one. It won't. Not until you become aware of the issues and slow down. You can do it by simple steps such as prolonging your lunch at work or home or taking regular 5,10 -minute breaks (or even longer if you need to) between your tasks.
Find those moments when you allow yourself to undisturbedly reflect on your feelings and emotions that go through your body and mind.
3 Tips on How to Feel Your Feelings
Here, I'll give you some tips that will help you be more connected to yourself.
1. Become Aware of Your Breathing
Proper breathing is vital for both mental and physical health. Yet, many times, we are utterly unaware of how we breathe. Therefore, one of my biggest goals for the past few years was bettering my overall breathing, which tells me in which state I am finding myself.
Depending upon which emotions and feelings you have, your breathing will change. If you're relieved and relaxed, you take much more profound and consistent intact breaths.
When you're stressed or angered, your breath changes radically. It's often out of the regular sync, and the breathing is way too fast, which indicates that you don't breathe in and out as you should.
Simply being aware of your breath and how it changes depending on the situation you find yourself in and how it makes you feel is critical to bettering your breathing technique.
The more aware and conscious you will become of your breath, the better you can adjust it, which will settle down your body and thoughts.
2. Learn to Be With Your Feelings and Observe Them
Sounds weird? It's not. Whatever you may feel, instead of getting a panic attack and trying to push the negative feeling or emotion away, allow it to stay within you. Trust me – it won't kill you.
Lay down and observe what goes through your mind and how your body behaves. You can feel your energy very clearly if you only manage to get rid of other distractions.
All those feelings and emotions are a significant part of you – both the positive as well as the negative ones. And remember this: if you didn't have negative emotions, you wouldn't be able to appreciate or even notice the positive ones.
As with everything, it takes practice, patience, and acceptance. Don't be hard on yourself for not being capable to calm down right away or for wanting to push a certain feeling away and initiate the escape mode – it's human.
3. Seek Someone You Can Talk With
Be it online or in the real world, try to seek out people you can talk with without being judged. Venting your troubles in life is essential, and part of the solution is to have someone that can listen to you and hear you out.
It may take some time to find the right person you click with if you haven't already, and in that case, try to remain patient. Trust me when I say that there are tons of people who seek the same. Therefore, try to be open to new contacts and connections.
Final Thoughts
Escaping the ever-ongoing hamster wheel of a busy life that many people experience daily can be very difficult. But the importance of allowing yourself to be human and properly vent what you feel within you should never be underestimated.
Having time to be with yourself and non-judgementally reflect on your life should be your priority and something you should allow yourself to consistently find time for, no matter what others around you think.
Read Further
- The Key Skill We Rarely Learn: How to Feel Your Feelings | Psychology Today
- Slow Down and Feel Your Feelings? | HuffPost Life
- Rejecting Hustle Culture: 4 Ways To Reduce Hurry And Increase Happiness
This content reflects the personal opinions of the author. It is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and should not be substituted for impartial fact or advice in legal, political, or personal matters.
© 2023 Jan Stepan
